Another of Matt's Amazing Writing Pieces

Pet Peeves

I like to think that I am a rational and sane human being. In fact I pride myself on that fact and I understand that even if I had some sort of irrational or illogical behavior, I would be able to identify it and give a perfectly reasonable explanation as to why said behavior was rational. I suppose I’ve already admitted to being an irrational person since trying to rationalize something that’s irrational is absurd. It must just be society that’s irrational, not me! So in that vein, I have decided to examine one of my biggest pet peeves: people taking the elevator to go up or down less than four floors, especially if they are a fat person. It’s a very common, acceptable and rational behavior, but it makes me cringe in unbelief and disgust.

Before examining the cause of my pet peeve and the effect it has on me, I wanted to define what a pet peeve is. A pet peeve could be described as anything that annoys, frustrates, or otherwise bothers someone into becoming upset. But what really makes a pet peeve stand apart from any garden variety general annoyance is that the subject of a pet peeve bothers me a lot more then it bothers you. You and the rest of society may not even think twice about it, but it disturbs me to the core. Does this make me irrational and a hate-monger? I think not, I may just be more sensitive to certain actions or behaviors due to traumatic early childhood experiences or certain prejudices, preconceived notions or even self-loathing because perhaps I can see a trait in another person that I posses and detest, thus giving me a reason to treat that person or that action with abhorrence. This is what makes a pet peeve special. It’s the personal, emotional connection with the action that makes it so much more poignant.

I’m overweight and I’m lazy. I believe I would be described as a semi-sedentary individual. I usually spend my free time sitting around watching TV or getting on the computer or doing something else that requires only my mind and sometimes not even that. I do know how to exercise though; I’ve read many books and articles on how to be an incredibly fit individual. I know how to get muscles like Arnold Schwarzenegger and obtain Bruce Lee-like flexibility and speed. The problem is, is that I only make the brain to body connection about once in every ten days. I’m only forty to fifty pounds overweight so it’s not like I’m a candidate for The Biggest Loser or even that I’m all that unhealthy, it’s just that in my mind it’s much more than fifty pounds. In my mind it’s a massive character flaw. You see, mentally, I know how to be an elite athlete and how to sculpt a rock-hard chiseled midsection. But physically I have failed to convert my knowledge into action, and because of that I feel bitter. I feel like I have failed to live up to my potential be it realistic or not.

Now I make a point of taking the stairs whenever possible. I’ll run up those bad boys like I own them. It’s liberating, I’m relying on nothing but my own body to speed myself toward my objective and I take pride in that. So when I see someone standing there, waiting for the elevator, ready to surrender away their freedom without hesitation just so that the elevator can carry them like an infant up a few floors, I know that I’m better than that person. It’s disgusting really, that someone would give up their God-given independence and vitality for that sarcophagus of weakness and apathy and corpulence. Taking the elevator or the stairs is the great social divide between a vigorous and vivacious person and a fat and flabby one. This is one of the rare social opportunities where you can make a statement and show everyone around you what kind of an individual you are. It doesn’t matter what you look like or who you are, you can prove that you have what it takes to be the best of the best just by travelling that stairway all the way to your own private heaven.

Or at least that’s the way I see it. I’m sure there are situations in all our lives where we see some things differently than everyone else does, and it usually stems from our own personal experiences and expectations. In my case, I feel bitter about my inaction when it comes to getting myself in shape and realizing the full extent of my physical potential. Because I have so much knowledge on the subject, I have built an image in my mind as to what I should be, or could be, if I physically applied the precepts that I have learned through my vast study. This is the personality that I often times project to other people. From the outside it is obviously hypocritical, but from the inside it has some merit: I firmly believe that that’s who I will become, but I’m just not there yet.

Ultimately my self-esteem issues cause me to judge others the same way that I judge myself. In my perfect world I would never be lazy or look for the easy way out. I would always be physically active and it would feel great. Just as I would be upset with myself for taking the elevator, I am bothered by others who choose to take it as well. Not because they are inferior people, but because I feel that I’m inferior. So the next time you judge someone, take the time to consider if it’s really them, or if it’s just you.

Matthew Green